Tag: Impotent

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Sexual Dysfunction

Impotent and Female Orgasm

Male Female Sexual Response, Inadequate,Orgasm,Inadequate Orgasm, impotent, inexperience sexual male, sexual response, male libido, sexual dysfunction, orgasmic dysfunction, woman sexuality, sex drive

Although emphasis has been placed upon the role of premature ejaculation in the etiology of primary orgasmic dysfunction, primary or secondary impotence also contributes. Again the basic theme of man and woman coital interaction must be emphasized.

If there is not a sexually effective male partner, the female partner has the dual handicap of fear for her husband’s sexual performance as well as for her own.

If there is no penile erection there will be no effective coital connection.

Frequently women married to impotent men cannot accept the idea of developing masturbatory facility or being manipulated to orgasm as a substitute for tension release.

However, if there has been a masturbatory pattern established before coital inadequacy assumes dominance, most women can return to this sexual outlet. In this situation there is sufficient dominance of the previously conditioned biophysical structure to overcome negative input from a psychosocial system distressed by sexual performance fears.

But if there have been no previous substitute measures established, many women cannot turn to this mode of relief once impotence halts effective coital connection. In this situation the psychosocial structure, unopposed by prior biophysical conditioning, assumes the dominant influence in the woman’s sexual response pattern.

Mr. and Mrs. D
were referred to treatment of orgasmic inadequacy after four years of marriage. When seen in therapy she was 27 and her husband 43 years old. He had been married twice previously. There were children of both marriages and none in the current marriage.

The husband also was sexually dysfunctional in that he was secondarily impotent.

His second marriage had been terminated due to his inability to continue effective coital connection. Although, when the unit was seen in consultation the marriage had been consummated, coitus occurred only once or twice a year.

Mrs. D’s background reflected somewhat limited financial means. Her father had died when the three siblings were young, and the family had been raised by their mother, who worked while the grandmother took care of the children.

Clothes were hand-me-downs, food the bare essentials. Her education had of necessity terminated with high school, and she worked as a receptionist in several different offices before her marriage. She continued to live at home while working and contributed what salary she made to help with the family’s limited income.

Mrs. D met her future husband when he visited the office where she worked. He invited the young woman to lunch. She accepted and married him four months later without knowledge of his sexual inadequacy, although she had been somewhat puzzled by his lack of forceful sexual approach during the brief courtship.

Mrs. D’s own sexual history had been one of a few unsuccessful attempts at masturbation, numerous petting episodes with boys in and out of high school, but no attempted coital connection. She had never been orgasmic.

Her husband had inherited a large estate and his financial situation certainly was the determining factor in his wife’s marital commitment. Since the girl had been distressed by a family background of genteel poverty, she felt the offer of marriage to be her real opportunity both to escape her environment and to help her two younger siblings.

The wedding trip was an unfortunate experience for Mrs. D when she realized for the first time that her husband had major functional difficulties. She knew little of male sexual response beyond the petting experiences but did try to help him achieve an erection by a multiplicity of stimulative approaches at his direction. There was no success in erective attainment.

The marriage was not consummated until six months after the ceremony. In the middle of the night Mr. D awoke with an erection, moved to his wife, and inserted the penis. She experienced mild pain but reacted with pleasure, feeling that progress had been made.

However, following the usual pattern of .a secondarily impotent male, progress was fleeting. As stated, there were only a few other coital episodes in the course of the four-year marriage. In these instances she always was awakened from sleep by her husband when he awoke to find himself with an erection.

Quick Ejaculation
Then there was rapid intromission and quick ejaculation. There was no history of a successful sexual approach by her husband under her conscious direction, insistence, or stimulation. Mr. D tried repetitively during long-continued manipulative and oral-genital sessions to bring his wife to orgasm, without result.

When they were referred for treatment, neither husband nor wife described sexual activity outside the marriage.

There have been 193 women treated for primary orgasmic dysfunction during the past 11years. Basically, in this method of therapy the sexually dysfunctional woman is approached through her sexual value system.

If its requirements are non serving limited, unrealistic, or inadequate to the marital relationship-by suggestion she is given an opportunity, with her husband’s help, to manipulate her biophysical and psychosocial structures of influence until an effective sexual value system is formed.

Categories
Secondary Impotence

Impotent by Paternal Dominance

Physiological, Male, Impotent, Sex Life, secondary impotence, prostate, erection, drug, penis size, prostate, prostate disease, enlarged prostate

Paternal dominance exactly the opposite type of history has been recorded in five cases of men referred for treatment of secondary impotence when therapy. His fears for sexual performance and, for that matter, almost any measure of performance were overwhelming.

His discussions in therapy were mixtures of praise and damnation for his father. His consistently hopeless personal comparisons with presumed levels of paternal performance were indeed sad to behold.

There have been five examples of one-parent family imbalance (permanent absence of either father or mother from the home). Retrospectively, the histories essentially join those of the composite reports of maternal or paternal dominance.

Therefore, there seems little relevance in further illustration. It really matters little whether parental dominance is achieved by force of personality, with the opposite partner continuing in the home as a second class citizen, or is irrevocably established by absence of one partner from the home on a permanent or semi permanent basis (professional demands, divorce, death, etc.).

Unopposed maternal or paternal dominance, regardless of how created, can destroy any susceptible young man’s confidence in his masculinity. With maternal dominance, the paternal role can be painted so gray and meaningless that there is little positive male adult patterning available for an impressionable teenager.

Unopposed paternal dominance:
May create such a concept of overwhelming masculinity for an impressionable teenager that it is impossible for him to match his ego strength with the paternal image enshrined by his fantasy.

With too little or too much masculinity as a pattern, he becomes increasingly sensitive to any suggestion of personal inadequacy.

Failure of performance, any performance, may be over whelming in its implications.

The beleaguered male frequently extrapolates real or presumed social and professional pressures into demands for performance. As his anxieties increase, he becomes progressively more unstable emotionally, is quite easily distracted, and complains of feeling chronically tired in a well-recognized behavior pattern.

Finally, some occasion of sexual demand finds him unable to respond effectively. For any sexually oriented, personally secure man there is always tomorrow.

But for the insecure, pressured male, it is the end of the line.

All else fades into the background as he focuses on this new failure. Is this the final evidence of loss of his masculinity? Fears of performance, regardless of original psychosocial focus, are rapidly transferred to sexual concern be cause it is so easy to remove sexual functioning from its natural physiological context.

From a single experience in erective failure may come permanent loss of erective capacity.

The real tragedy of unopposed parental dominance is that it leaves the susceptible male sibling vulnerable when his insecure masculinity must face the sexual challenge of our culture. Regardless of how innocuous the level of that challenge may seem to others, to the concerned man every bedding is indeed a demand for performance.

Religious orthodoxy provided the same handicap to the secondarily impotent male as that emphasized in the discussion of the primarily impotent man. Twenty-six instances of secondary impotence directly related to religious orthodoxy have been identified among 213 men referred for secondary impotence.

To a significant degree, the histories of primarily and secondarily impotent men are almost parallel when religious orthodoxy has major etiological influence. Six of 32 cases of primary impotence were at least sensitized to sexual dysfunction by their religious backgrounds.

The histories of the 6 men with primary impotence and the 26 referred for treatment of secondary impotence show remarkable parallels with the exception that there must be at least one instance of successful coitus in the history of the secondarily impotent men.

The 26 cases of religious orthodoxy divide into 6 Jewish; 11 Catholic; 4 fundamentalist Protestant; and 5 mixed marriages in which both husband and wife, although professing different religious beliefs, were gravely influenced by rigid controls of religious orthodoxy during their formative years.

The symptoms of secondary impotence frequently do not appear for the first hundred or even thousand exposures to sexual function.

A significant exception is established when reviewing the histories of these 26 men. Severity of religious orthodoxy places pathological stress on any initial coital process. For the relatively non susceptible male, regardless of the sexual handicap of theo logical rigidity, this tension-filled opportunity usually is met without failure at sexual functioning, or if there is failure, repetitive sexual exposure during the honeymoon provides ample opportunity for successful completion.

There are, however, a number of susceptible men who do not follow the usual male pattern of successful consummation of marriage. These are the individuals who may develop symptoms of primary or secondary impotence.

Erection influence by religious orthodoxy, the symptoms of secondary impotence develop through two well-identified response patterns.

The first pattern divides into two specific forms:

  1. Infrequent success in the first coital opportunity usually followed, despite this initial success, by failure in the first few weeks or months of the marriage.
  2. most frequent, erective failure usually underscored during the first sexual opportunity provided by the honeymoon and continuing despite virginally frantic efforts to accomplish consummation.

For some ill-defined reason a successful vaginal penetration is recorded in the first month or six weeks of marriage; occasionally this is followed by a few more uneventful sexual experiences, but soon fears of performance assume unopposed dominance and, thereafter, the male is essentially impotent.

In the second pattern, at least six months and frequently many years will pass without consummation of the marriage. Then in some unexplained manner, vaginal penetration finally is accomplished and there is wild celebration, but the future is indeed dark.

There usually is a brief period of time (a week to a year at the most) in which sexual function continues alternatively encouraged by a success and depressed by a failure. Fears of performance fight for dominance, but so does the sexually stimulative warmth of a partner.

Effective sexual functioning assumes an off-again, on-again cyclic pattern. This cycling of sexual dysfunction is castrating in itself. The untoward effects are essentially as damaging as if the marriage had continued unconsummated.

The pattern of occasionally successful sexual functioning followed by inexplicable erective failure produces a loss of masculine security and abject humiliation for the untutored, apprehensive, sexually immature male, and creates a high level of frustration and loss of both social and personal security for the female partner.

Categories
Impotence Cure

Impotent Remedy

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Erective incompetence occasionally develops from physical causes at various stages in the life cycle. Anything from extremely low thyroid function in the third decade to a perineal prostatectomy in the sixth decade can and does result in secondary impotence.

But these obviously are pathological, not “natural,” causes. “Natural” is used in terms of usual or routine or to be expected from birth.

Impotence may not be a naturally occurring phenomenon, but susceptibility to combinations of etiological factors can push any man so far from his natural cycle of sexual response that he develops fears for effective functioning.

In turn, these fears can distract from or even obviate the possibility of a full erective response to any form of sexual stimulation.

Concepts of treatment for symptoms of primary and secondary impotence are so basically identical that the following discussion can be applied without reservation to either syndrome.

Concepts of treatment for symptoms of primary and secondary impotence are so basically identical that the following discussion can be applied without reservation to either syndrome.

Whenever an impotent man commits himself to therapy for sexual dysfunction, he does so with far more personal insecurity than the usual degree of trepidation seen in most new patients.

He approaches constituted authority with full conviction that nothing can be done to reverse his distress, yet he fantasies himself as a sexually effective male.

The impotent man is certain that he stands alone in his sexual inadequacy, that there rarely, if ever, has been a situation so involved, so frustrating, and so hopeless.

Frequently, he has begun to view his marital partner as a major liability. He is all too aware that she is fully knowledgeable of the dimensions of his sexual inadequacy and therefore of the degree of his presumed loss of masculinity.

Knowledge of his sexual inadequacy by anyone else is indeed threatening to sexual assurance for many men.

Impotent Psychological Confidence

For some men, this knowledge on the part of the wife also constitutes a threat to social confidence. Husbands are gravely concerned that wives will discuss the sexual inadequacy at the bridge table or the coffee klatch and, sadly enough, some wives do just that.

Unable to contend with their own severe levels of personal and sexual frustration, they find release in suggesting subtly or pointing out graphically that the men they have married are sexually incompetent.

Wives traumatize their sexually dysfunctional husbands just as husbands slight their sexually dysfunctional wives for a variety of reasons in addition to those of frustration or revenge.

Wives must find an explanation for their own lack of effective sexual functioning, but, above all, they seek reassurance that the state of sexual inadequacy in the marriage exists despite their every effort to resolve the difficulty and that it is not their fault.

The fact that the psychosocial aspects of the marriage are not progressing satisfactorily usually is painfully obvious to all reasonably close observers. But to take the humiliating step of public accusation is indeed almost unforgivable.

Inevitably this adds to the level of psychosocial trauma the man must bear. It further separates the marital partners from any hope of mutual support and certainly closes any remaining lines of communication.

The difficulties in the therapeutic reversal of the sexual dysfunction are thereby increased and, as a consequence, the percentage of positive return from any therapeutic procedure is reduced. For all these reasons, either partner’s discussion of marital-unit sexual dysfunction other than with selected authority is potentially destructive.

Categories
Impotence Cure

Impotent in Marriage

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A word must be said for the cooperative wives of sexually inadequate husbands. They may arrive in therapy frustrated, resentful, bitter, revengeful, or still devoted to this man of their choice.

Regardless of the manner in which they approach therapy, once they have assured themselves that every effort is being made to treat the marital relationship; not just the sexually inadequate male, the full cooperation of more than 90 percent of the wives seen by Foundation personnel has made the vital difference between success and failure in therapy.

Wives cooperation
The wives’ depth of cooperation with therapeutic suggestions is engendered primarily by the participation of the female member of the therapy team. When wives realize they always have available as a cotherapist not only a friend but also an interpreter, their willingness to cooperate usually is excellent.

They realize they are working with their husbands for their marriage. Specific directions as to handling the psyche of her husband, her place in the scheme of therapy, and, above all, her role in a sexually functional marriage come from the female cotherapist, usually in individual sessions.

Impotence Research

The overall results obtained from attempting symptom reversal of primarily and secondarily impotent men referred to the Foundation are far from satisfactory.

The best statistical measure of the clinical results is the rate of failures.

Although the results obtained represent significant improvement over previously published material, the failure rates are still far too high. There has been improvement as work has progressed, but there is still a long way to go before there can be professional satisfaction with clinical progress.

It should be emphasized once more that etiological influence usually was multiple in origin, and that category assignment has been merely on the basis of professional decision as to the major influence among the multiple etiological forces.

For example
The predinical diabetes is but one of several etiological factors influencing the 11 men so listed.

Brief survey:
Indicates a 40.6 percent failure rate in the treatment of primary impotence during two weeks of intensive educational process. There is hope for continuing improvement if we state additionally that there were 9 failures in the treatment of the first 16 cases and 4 failures in treating the last 16 cases of primary impotence over the last 11 years. The downward trend certainly should continue in this failure rate.

There was a 26.2 percent failure rate recorded in the two weeks’ attempt to reverse the symptoms of secondary impotence over the 11 years in the Foundation.

Unfortunately, there has been no significant reduction in the failure rate as experience has accrued.

Of course these statistics represent only the percentage failure of symptom removal during the acute phase of treatment. Any treatment termed successful by this measure has little clinical value unless the symptom reversal proves to be permanent.

Therefore, while failure rates in the acute-treatment phase are of obvious import, consideration of any corresponding success rate must be held in abeyance until at least five years after termination of the acute phase of therapy.

The influences:
Religious orthodoxy and homosexual orientation represent the two areas of ideological influence associated with the highest level of treatment failure in primary and secondary impotence.

There was a 66.6 percent immediate failure to reverse symptoms of primarily impotent men, and a 50 percent failure to reverse symptoms of secondarily impotent men influenced by religious orthodoxy.

No other category approaches this in treatment failure. The nearest approach is provided by those men with an etiological background of homosexuality, usually adolescent in onset.

Here 33.3 percent of the primarily impotent men and exactly the same figure of secondarily impotent men failed to respond positively to the two weeks’ intensive-treatment program. It is in these two areas that so much more work needs to be done.

Currently there is an inexcusably high level of failure rate in therapeutic return for patients handicapped by either of these two specific etiological influences.

It must always be borne in mind that it is the individual man’s susceptibility to etiological influences that determines whether he is to survive as a sexually functional male or is to fall into a pattern of inadequate sexual responsivity. Of the factors initiating or controlling this innate susceptibility we know so little.

Categories
Impotence Cure

Alternative Impotent Treatment

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Often both husband and wife find that partial or complete penile erection develops when they are merely following directions to pursue alternative sensate patterns of “pleasuring” one another without direct physical approach to the pelvic areas.

Whether a full erection develops during the first days of concentration on sensate focus is of little moment.

What is important, erection or not, is for cotherapists to take advantage of the marital-unit’s newfound means of physical communication, that of providing mutually for each other’s sensate pleasure, in order to describe in detail the concept of erection as a natural physiological reaction.

Attain Erection

Again and again therapists should hammer at the basic principle that erective attainment, like breathing or bowel or bladder function, is a capacity men are born with, not a function they must be trained to accomplish.

Husband and wife are assured and reassured that no man can will an erection and that the only thing accomplished by such attempts is blocking of sensate input from his sexual partner.

The concept of the biophysical and psychosocial systems of influence aids immeasurably in marital comprehension of the previously inexplicable results accrued from blocking of sensate input.

There are other advantages to the members of the sexually dysfunctional couple than absorption of the pleasures of sensate focus during the first two or three days after the roundtable discussion.

This is a necessary period of mental and physical relaxation from the high tension levels inherent in the strain of cooperating with the detailed personal evaluations scheduled during the first three days of participation in the program.

This respite also provides for release of nervous tensions accumulated during the last few days or weeks before husband and wifes move to meet scheduled appearance dates at the Foundation.

Finally, there is mutual opportunity to reestablish lines of communication of both verbal and nonverbal variety.

These lines of communication have been markedly inhibited or essentially destroyed by the physical tensions and the psychic trauma developing directly from and/or secondary to their sexually dysfunctional status.

On the second day, after the roundtable discussion, the program moves toward coordinating the theoretical discussions between cotherapists and the couple, described above, and the specific functional directions to be followed by husband and wife in the privacy of their bedroom.

Instructions are given to return to sensate focus procedures during the subsequent 24 hours.

Male and Female Genitalia

Direct approach to the male and female external genitalia, including the female breast, is encouraged. Underscored positively is the instruction that there is no concern for the amount of vaginal lubrication nor the effectiveness of the penile erection or, for that matter, whether or not there is any lubrication or an erection.

The essence of the directions is that each individual take advantage of this non demanding opportunity to show what most pleases him or her in any overt sexual approach to the pelvic organs.

When the husband is to excite his wife, it is suggested that they, rather than he, participate in her pleasuring and at her direction. After a comfortable period of sensate stroking of her total body area, the approach to the pelvic area should be under her control.

The wife’s hand should be placed on her husband’s to guide and to show him what really pleases her in terms of manual positioning, pressure, direction, or rapidity of stroking. There is positive reinforcement for any man learning what really pleases the women of his choice by having her quietly show him the specifics of her sensual interest.

Then the husband must, in return, provide educative opportunity for his wife. When his wife, after tracing his face, rubbing his back, or playing with his fingers, approaches his pelvic area, his hand should be on hers.

In this most effective form of nonverbal communication, he must indicate which of the multiple varieties of pelvic approach provides the most pleasure for him.

The particular areas of the penis:
are the most sensitive, the comfortable degree of manual constriction of the penile shaft, and the desired rapidity and tension of penile stroking are basic information that a wife wants to learn from her husband.

Anything that husband or wife might have learned from prior masturbatory experience that would tend to increase the levels of sensate pleasure should be shared freely with the marital partner. Often this material can only be elicited at the direction of the cotherapist.

At this time, authority should strongly emphasize in joint session that acquiring mechanical or technical skill is not a major focus of therapy.

For example
It is important for a husband to know how to approach the clitoral area when stimulating his wife, but therapists should point out that a physical approach that is exciting for the wife today may be relatively non stimulative or even irritating tomorrow.

Attaining skill at physical stimulation is of minor moment compared to the comprehension that this is but another, most effective means of marital-unit communication.

It should be underscored constantly that what really is happening in their private sessions of physical expression is that a man and a woman committed to each other are learning to communicate their physical pleasures and their physical irritations in an area that heretofore in our culture has been denied the dignity of freedom of communication.

What better level of nonverbal communication can be attained between the impotent man and his wife than, when placing his hand on hers, he teaches her what really pleases him in penile stimulation.

With cotherapists constantly emphasizing the demand to open the lines of communication within the sexually traumatized couple, and husband and wife establishing their nonverbal communication at the most important of all communicative levels, that of the marriage bed, the marital couple is really doing its own therapy.

They are teaching each other specifically what pleases. Although they frequently do not realize it at this stage in their therapy, husband and wife are focusing their attention on each other rather than involuntarily assuming roles as spectators to physical response and thus perpetuating their mutual fears for his performance.